Kes, you are not concentrating.

I'm sorry, Tuvok. I know that when you lean back and steeple your fingers like that, it's not working. But I am trying.

No doubt. By the amount of tension showing on your face, I must speculate that perhaps you are trying too hard.

Is that the problem, then? Can I be sabotaging my own efforts by wanting to read everybody's thoughts too badly?

Kes, I wish to explain something. The ability to reach out to others minds, to hear their thoughts, is an ability you already possess. You do not have to want it; it is yours. I have felt this talent in you many times, and you have successfully channeled it in the past. Today seems to be different.

Am I doing something wrong? Not preparing properly?

I do not believe the problem lies with your preparations, or with your talent. This process is unique to each individual, so there is no right or wrong way to proceed.

But, Tuvok....

I can only conclude that you are impeding yourself.

Myself? But why would I do that?

That is exactly what we need to uncover.

How do we do that?

First, I must ask a few questions. They may seem personal, even unusual, but please answer them as honestly as you can.

All right.

Is there anything currently occurring in your life that might cause you confusion or discord?

Well... Neelix was talking about wanting my help to rearrange the kitchen after the wedding, and the doctor is also thinking of modifying some aspects of Sickbay. My duties may change after the reorganization.

Two rather significant changes.

Could that be it?

Possibly. Is there anything else? The more information we have to consider, the better our success will be.

I can't think of -

Rule out nothing. Have you been eating properly, sleeping, working more or less than usual -

Sleeping. I haven't slept well lately.

Do you know the reason? .... Kes, please remember that anything you tell me will remain in the strictest confidence.

Oh, Tuvok, I know that. It's not that at all. It's....

Please go on.

I'm not sure what it is, Tuvok. I dream at night. All the time, but when I wake up, I can't remember anything about the dreams except... except a song. No. Maybe it's just a melody, repeating over and over and over.... That's it! Tuvok! The song from my dreams - I heard that same song just now, when I was trying to sort through the thoughts of the crew.

Excellent. Now that we have....

Oh.

You've thought of something else?

Yes. I think I might recognize the song.

You sound as if that is distasteful. Does this tune harbor a painful memory for you?

No, not a memory. Just.... I don't want to admit it, but I can't help it. It makes me angry.

Angry? An unusual reaction. How -

It makes a great deal of sense, now that I understand. Let me explain. My quarters are close to Harry's.

Ensign Kim?

We're neighbors. But I've never had problems with Harry before. He's polite, understanding, always a gentleman.

You seem to hold the ensign in high regard.

Oh, I do.

Then I confess that I do not understand. If you like Ensign Kim, why does living next to him make you angry?

It's... nothing. It's so small. I'm sure that it will sound extremely petty.

I remind you that we are not all alike. What is a minor annoyance to some can be a major complication for others.

All right. You see, he's practicing for his concert, and I know that in order for him to sound as accomplished as he is, he has to play the same song again and again, practice the notes exactly as he wants to play them at the concert. He let me listen to a recording of the piece I heard tonight; it's a difficult song. I often hear him play through it, both during the day and at night. And it's driving me crazy!

I see. You are hearing this song often enough that your subconscious is even bringing it out in your dreams.

It's awful! I wake up humming it, I sing it during the day, then I dream about it! It never goes away! Tuvok, what can I do about this?

Have you tried talking to the ensign? Perhaps he is willing to forgo practicing during the times you are in your quarters.

I can't ask him to do that! His concert is only a few days away, and if he plays poorly because of me, I will never be able to forgive myself.

Have you tried adjusting your schedule around his?

Yes. But I never know when he'll have a spare moment to practice.

That can be unpredictable. Perhaps you could sleep elsewhere?

Well, I suppose I could sleep in Sickbay, at least until the concert is over. But wait, the doctor is in the habit of doing a great deal of his modifying during the night rotation - he says there are fewer people awake to bother him.

Then that would not be a viable option. Perhaps you could stay with Mr. Neelix?

Neelix is up half the night, planning for the wedding. He says he's more creative when there are fewer people awake to -

...to bother him. Yes. I begin to understand your difficulty in this situation.

Do you have any suggestions, Tuvok? I'm getting desperate.

Short of changing your quarters, I am....

You stopped. What is it?

Something you mentioned a moment ago. You heard Ensign Kim's song while listening to the crew.

Yes. Harry must have been thinking about it.

It is the same song?

Yes.

How well do you know this song?

I don't know the title, but I would recognize it anywhere. I've heard recordings of it, and Harry plays it at least every other day, more often now that his concert is getting closer.

Hmm. I am curious, Kes - does the ensign play it the same way each time he repeats it?

I'm not sure. I think so. Why?

Patience. I will explain myself when I feel I have enough information. When you hear the song in your dreams, is it exactly the same as when the ensign plays it?

I don't know. I think so.

Try to be certain.

I... I guess I'm not sure. What difference does it make?

I can't say at this time. As of now, I have only a theory. But one simple task will help in proving it. You must try to contact Ensign Kim's thoughts, listen to the song again. Will you try?

Of course, if you think it will help.

I do. Let us begin. Close your eyes. See nothing with your eyes. You must ignore that which can distract and interfere with your mind. Your mind is a clear space. See it, feel it, know that it is yours. Is your mind empty, Kes?

Yes.

Good. Now, move beyond yourself. Hear the beings around you.

I can hear them. I'm starting to separate them now.

Excellent. Listen for -

I can hear him! He's singing along with his clarinet... it's amazing! His mind is at least two notes ahead of his fingers.

Intriguing.

He missed that trill! And the next run. He should have played a sharp instead of a 'c' natural. Now he's starting over, but he's still singing the middle section. He missed the trill again. And the sharp, but he's continuing this time. Why doesn't he stop and fix it?

I admit I do not know. But I thank you for your attempt. I believe you have given more depth to my theory, if not proven it altogether.

What do you mean?

Though you thought you were hearing the same song, in reality you are hearing two different songs: the song that Harry wants to play, and the song that he is playing. There is no way that you would have known of the specific mistakes he is making if you did not already know the correct version of the song.

So what you're saying is he knows the song correctly in his mind, which is what I'm hearing now, but he's playing it wrong, and that's what I hear when he practices.

Exactly. It is not a surprise that you were so distressed.

Oh, Tuvok, I'm so relieved! I was beginning to worry that it was Harry that I didn't like anymore, when it's actually just his playing.

Or rather, his practicing.

What do we do now? We know the problem, but not how to fix it.

I suggest that we have an immediate conference with Mr. Kim.

You mean tell him what we've discovered.

You would both undoubtedly be greatly relieved by the encounter.

I know I would be!

Then there is no point in delaying the meeting. Are you game, as the captain would say?

Absolutely. Anything to get this stupid song out of my head. And Tuvok....

Yes.

Thank you.

Chapter 6 || Contents || Chapter 8