Disclaimer: Wish this could really happen... But, as I don't own them, and made no money off this... uh, dream..., we'll just have to keep dreaming... and writing fanfic for others to enjoy.
Takes place in eighth season, right after the ending of 'The Pete Affair.'
Jack craned his neck again so that he could have a second
view of the stars in the night sky.
You know, Carter, even if
these constellations are alien, I'll never get tired of
looking at the stars like this, at night, in the light of just a
fire, and nothin' else, he softly said into the darkness
Sam leaned back as well, staring up at the inky blackness
Yeah, she quietly agreed. The night sky made her
feel like she and he were the only two people alive on this
planet. And as PRX-659 was a totally deserted planet, her
feelings weren't too far off the mark.
Jack went on,
Even if I don't get to do this nearly often
enough as a General, it's still... He thought for a moment,
searching his mind for an appropriate comparison. Eventually, he
had to give up, and lamely finished,
It's just really
Smiling at his choice of words, or lack of words, Sam added,
It makes me think of that time Daniel ascended.
Jack questioningly peered at her through the dark.
he went all glowy? he ascertained. When she nodded, he
Why, for Heaven's sake?
Meeting his gaze, Sam shrugged.
If there is such a thing
as an ascended being, I always imagined that they would be... you
know... She gestured with a wave of her hand at the
surrounding sky, and glanced up one more time.
she softly ended at last. Suddenly, she lowered her eyes and
Stupid, I know, but I can't help it.
A slow smile crept over Jack's face.
Besides being a
genius, you're a romantic... Whodda thunk?
Sam's blush deepened, and her features reddened for a moment
in the firelight.
Sorry, she immediately said.
don't mean to get all mushy on you...
But Jack was quick to hush her.
Feel free to get as
mushy as you want, he invited with a grin.
I just didn't
know that about you, that's all, he went on to explain.
You surprised me. Then he lost his smile as he
Not much surprises me these days.
Silence fell on them, then, as they continued to gaze into the firelight knifing through the dark of the planet that offered nothing but naqueda. They'd found tons of the metal alloy practically lying on the planet's surface, waiting to be gathered. Even though Sam's father's funeral had only been a week and a half before, she, along with her unique expertise on naqueda, had agreed to check out this incredible reserve, to declare whether or not the assets on the planet really were as good as the original MALP readings had indicated them to be. Jack had agreed to accompany her on this easy in-and-out mission, as he so rarely got to 'stretch his legs' any longer as the commanding General of the SGC. If anybody protested his desire to do his stretching off world, he asked them to think of it as a vacation. As he had done little in the past year but work endlessly at the SGC, nobody had the temerity to argue the definition of the word 'vacation' with him.
But naqueda exploration hardly rated letting an archaeologist tag along, or a Jaffa warrior, so Daniel and Teal'c were safely, and happily, ensconced back in the SGC, going about the business of translating long dead languages, or bulking up already huge muscles, or eating until the Commissary was empty of food, or drinking yet another cup of coffee, or... Jack didn't understand how one puny archaeologist could drink as much coffee as Daniel did, or how one ex-Jaffa warrior could possibly eat as much as Teal'c did on a regular basis, but... He shook his head in fond amusement in the light of the remains of the fire.
What are you thinking about? came Sam's voice through
Jack answered immediately, if a bit absently.
thinking about Teal'c and his awesome eating habits, not to
mention Daniel, and his awesome coffee fixation.
Yeah, wonder if they have any food or
coffee left in the Commissary after that breakfast we all ate
right before you and I left Earth.
Jack glanced up at her and smiled.
The place may never
be the same, he announced.
Sam laughed, the sound of her enjoyment at his thoughts tinkling over the empty landscape.
Ever since Sam had announced the end of her engagement to that cop from Denver, she had relaxed more in Jack's company again, and Jack had grown much easier in hers. The jokes they had in common, and their natural sense of banter had increased to the point it had been before Jack's promotion to General had gone through. The trip they had all spent on a team bonding excursion at his cabin in Minnesota during the weekend before had done wonders to increase the ease and friendship he and she shared. Their resulting mutual companionship made him more comfortable, as well her. It was no wonder he had chosen to join her on this particular mission.
Jack sighed, utterly content for the moment. Nope, life doesn't get much better than hearing Samantha Carter laughing at night, on a totally deserted planet, under the stars, Jack thought to himself. He smiled even wider, and moved his gaze back to the fire lest he tempt himself too much with watching her eyes twinkle becomingly in the darkness. Besides the friendship and relaxation he now experienced around her, he felt the familiar tug of what he'd thought were long dead yearnings in his heart, and he fought to bury the building sensations.
Another quiet moment went by, but the quiet was a comfortable silence. Jack sighed, still happy just to be there, sitting next to her, even if he knew that he couldn't make any romantic overtures to her. He was simply content to be with her again. After another moment went by, Sam added her sigh to his.
At last, she said in solemn voice,
Jack interrupted her to teasingly say,
I'd be getting
worried if I knew that you had decided to stop thinking. He
was always truly amazed at the kind of things that went through
her mind. He waited to be amazed yet again.
Sam sent him a slightly sour expression.
she said, her voice indicating that she didn't hold his last
statement against him. But she went on, teasing him now.
Knowing that the General of the base wonders about my thinking
habits wouldn't look all that good in my final mission report,
Aw... I can hardly help being just a bit
sarcastic. Come on, he wheedled.
You still love me
Jack had been joking when he made his last statement, and hadn't been thinking about his words too heavily beforehand, but now he sat very still, hardly daring to breath as the limbs of the tree he was resting against blew slightly in the breeze. He studiously ignored her as he sat by the fire, and played with a leaf on the ground.
Sam knew that he had been joking when he mentioned her
loving him, but she couldn't help letting her gaze slide to his
for just a second as she quietly proclaimed,
This really was an idyllic planet, but Jack wasn't paying
attention to the scenery any longer. He cleared his throat,
cleared it again, illustrating his nervousness so well that it
was as if he had hit her over the head with it. Eventually, he
Are we talking about what I think we're talking
Sam was studying the ground under her feet. She only gave
one fearful glance up at the last minute before answering,
Yeah. Louder, she continued,
Or, at least, I am.
She looked up more closely at him then. There was fear, and
determination, in her pained expression as she admitted,
guess I don't know what you're...
Jack sat up as he interrupted her a second time.
Do you really think it's a good thing to be talking
Probably not, Sam admitted with a sigh, and blinked.
Another moment went by. She finally said,
But I can't help it
if I'm thinking about it, can I? She snorted, then.
been thinking about it all day. She added,
Eight years, actually...
Um.., Jack responded. He hated that he never knew
what to say when she brought up the issue of their
non-relationship, even when it was alluded to in a completely
What was he supposed to say? What could he
Um... Talk about setting a guy up!
Sam smiled, if a bit nervously.
You don't have to feel
like you need to say anything, she absolved.
I know it's
already difficult enough to talk about this as it is,
Jack tried to remember how to breath.
It's good that you
think that way, he replied, then went on to explain,
Because I can't think of anything to say right now. He
looked at his boots.
I know that's kinda lame, but...
Do you ever think about the 'what ifs?' she suddenly
Jack was confused.
The 'what ifs,' Sam repeated herself.
possible things that could have happened four years ago after
those Za'tarc tests.
Jack wriggled uncomfortably against the tree at his back.
I try not to think about those tests too much at all, he
blurted without considering how his comment might sound to
Oh, she said, startled at his honesty. She now
brooked the subject of their feelings with a lot less assumption
on her part.
I never thought...
I mean, Jack amended as he slowly drew a breath of
air into his tight lungs.
I mean, he repeated. Finally,
he had to admit,
I know myself pretty well by now, Carter.
He was still talking to his feet as he went on,
wouldn't... He sighed, squeezed his eyes shut, and just
I wouldn't be able to stop myself... with thinking...
just once. He peeked at her through his half-opened eyes as
his heart raced in his chest.
I might... think again, he
And then I might do... And I can't. We
can't, he corrected.
So, I'm better off not...
thinking... to begin with.
Sam sighed again into the night.
Maybe you're right.
Yet, she asked,
But, do you ever wonder what would happen
No, Jack instantly answered, even though he had
thought about it, and thought often. However, he was even so
afraid of what she was asking him that he wouldn't let her finish
I was just... wondering, she said.
Jack let the quiet between them stretch almost to the
breaking point before he could gather together enough courage to
Wondering what, specifically? He asked again,
What, exactly, are you wondering?
Sam glanced at him, her fear and hesitation showing clearly
in her expression.
I was... wondering... what it might be
like... if we... She paused again.
If we..? Jack prompted.
Sam tried to go on,
She gave in then. In a frustrated voice, she blurted,
we kissed... Just once.
Jack's heart painfully skipped several beats.
already kissed, he quickly choked back at her.
locker room, during that plague thing. He gazed
questioningly at her, but was frightened enough that his left eye
kept twitching. He ignored it as best he could to ask,
have you forgotten about that?
I could never forget about that, Sam said, a bit
But what I mean is, kiss without any strange
contagion leading our actions, or in some dream created by some
alien virus, or...
Or in a time loop, maybe, Jack filled in for her.
Sam stared at him out of suspicious eyes.
something like that, she said.
Jack seemed to consider for a moment, then he responded by
lying in a nonchalant tone,
Nope, can't say that I've ever
wondered about that.
I don't believe you, Sam said, immediately calling
him on his fabrication.
What? Jack asked, surprised that she had seen through
him so easily. Usually, people had the tendency to take
everything he said at face value. Bearing the rank of a General
in the military had its perks, such as never having to explain
But now Sam sent him a disbelieving look.
Excuse me for
saying this, Sir, but that's a load of blullshit.
Jack gave an undignified splutter, he was so surprised by
her words. It was extremely rare for him to be called a liar,
and even rarer for it to be done so... colorfully.
I... Uh... Finally, he settled on one particular thing that
she had said.
How can you say... what you said... and still
call me 'Sir'?
Sam glared again.
I practice, she brazenly answered.
Then she went on,
But I can't believe that you've never at
least wondered about what would have happened if I had... or you
Jack broke in on her comment.
Of course I've
wondered, he admitted then in an acerbic tone, irritated at
being caught, and being caught by her in particular.
that's all I can ever do, 'cause I know myself, and... I could
never do something just once, he told her again.
with you... And it wouldn't be safe to do anything more
than once, so... He shrugged, playing with the stick he'd
grabbed from under the tree, and now held in his fingers.
It's just better that I don't even go there, he said, and
tried not to look at her, but looked at her anyway out of the
corners of his eyes.
Sam studied him, noticing how nervous he was according to
his shaking hands. He really didn't like talking about this, she
knew, yet she forged on,
What if it wasn't just once?
Jack gave such a jerk against his tree that he dropped the
stick he'd been holding. He stared at her, astonished.
hearing you right? Didn't you just put a stop to something like
this happening to you? he asked, speaking of her now defunct
And now you're telling me that you actually
Sam calmly regarded him.
I know that's not what you
might expect from someone so bent on following the rules as I
Hell no! Jack burst out.
Sam was confused now, and looked at him with a furrowed
'Hell no,' as in there's no way that you'll even
consider this, or 'Hell no,' as in you haven't taken the time to
Of course I've thought about it! he repeated, and
sent his own glare at her.
And I've thought about it, and
thought, and daydreamed, and just about drove myself nuts
But you never said...
I couldn't say anything! Jack exclaimed.
father would have killed me if he had ever heard that
Sam rolled her eyes, and disparagingly said,
father... You could have told him to take a flying leap into the
Jack's eyebrows went up.
Can I quote you on
You bet! she firmly replied.
It was none of his
business, really, she darkly muttered.
He'd been scaring
my boyfriends off for decades, she told him.
I'm not your boyfriend, Jack was quick to scoff.
I'm so not your boyfriend that you found someone else to be
that kind of a friend to you. Why did he feel as if he had
to remind her all the time of what she had recently chosen to
give up? He added,
And we could be court-martialed if I was
that boyfriend you keep talking about, so...!
We can be court-martialed already,
I don't plan to get court-martialed at all, as a matter
of fact, he told her.
Then don't get caught, she mildly suggested.
Jack gaped at her. Was she..?
Are you actually saying
Sam sighed in irritation.
Look, Jack, we're not
magically getting any younger, here, and neither of us can keep
waiting in limbo like this forever, and...
Damn! She had called him by his given name instead of her
more common 'Sir!' Jack was so surprised that he almost couldn't
make his mouth form the words necesssary to interrupt her.
But Carter.., he protested. He had never heard her be so
direct before. It unsettled him.
I mean... It more than
unsettled him! He ran an agitated hand through his hair. He
found it much harder to be equally as truthful to her as she was
being to him.
What you're suggesting is... Finally, he
stared straight at her to honestly say what was on his mind.
But you were engaged to...
An engagement I ended, she broke in to remind him.
Had to end, really, because of... She interrupted
herself, then, to offer something that she knew he couldn't
Are you scared? she challenged.
Jack gazed back at her in incredulity.
You bet I am!
he finally exclaimed.
And I bet you are, too, for all your
bravado about... about... What did he call this? He gave
up, and simply said,
About what you're suggesting.
Yeah, she admitted at last.
You're right... I'm
scared. Then she sighed, and confessed,
But I'm just as
scared that I'll let this chance that I have slip by because I'm
so afraid of what can happen that I'll follow the rules, play it
safe, be what I think my father always expected me to be, she
Jack peered at her.
Is that why you're even thinking
about this? Because of your father?
Sam considered what he'd asked.
reluctantly said after a long, silent minute.
But I wouldn't
quite say that this is in reaction to what he's always expected,
Good, Jack cut her off.
Because I would hate to
be used like that, as nothing but a support for...
Sam's head snapped up at his words. She stared at him in
Use you? I would never treat you like that!
she declared. She sounded horrified, now.
As if I could even
Now he was really confused.
But that's what you're
suggesting, Jack cut off her comment to say.
That's probably what it sounds like to
you, I guess.
He gazed at her, his puzzlement growing.
That's not what
you're saying here?
Sam heaved a heavy, defeated sigh. She put a hand to her
forehead in sudden misery, and shook he head.
Forget it. I
don't know what I... She abruptly moved to get up from her
place on the ground by the fire.
I'm going to bed... I'll
see you in the morning.
Jack put a hand out to stop her as she started to rise.
That's not what I'm saying, he announced, and then pled,
Geez, Carter, don't go like this...
Like how? she inquired, half standing, half sitting,
and ultimately looking like an undecided idiot.
Jack pulled her back to the ground beside him, and
apologized right away.
I'm sorry... I didn't mean to make
you angry, or...
I'm not angry.., Sam argued.
Not even a little? Jack asked, cajoling.
Well, okay, she admitted.
Jack grinned back.
Can I call it, or what? He
hadn't even realized that he was touching her until now. When he
understood what he was doing, he slowly began to withdraw his
I don't mind your hand, Sam instantly said to make
him pause in removing his fingers' grip from around her arm.
It feels kinda nice, actually, she granted.
Nice? Jack couldn't do anything but stare, unable to decide what to say to her.
You aren't hurting me, you know, she told him then,
in case that was what he was thinking.
You don't have to look
I'm not terrified, Jack immediately objected, though
his heart, already racing, was now racing in double time.
least, not very, he said, more honest at last.
Sam spluttered her laughter.
Her laughter caused joy to inadvertently bubble in his
heart. Almost with a will of its own, Jack's hand was compelled
to inch up her arm, to her shoulder, and from there, move on to
cradle her cheek. It was the smoothest thing he'd ever felt.
God, your skin is so soft, he commented in an amazed
whisper. How did she make it that way? Or was it just him that
thought that it was the softest thing he'd ever felt?
The rest of me is just as soft, Sam daringly told him
as she carefully drew closer to him until she could smell his
I bet you are, Jack had to comment. Then, he
I mean you are... It is... Damn.., he muttered.
He seemed determined to make a fool of himself tonight.
But Sam didn't look like she minded too much. She was too busy noticing how he was now flicking his eyes from her own eyes to her lips, and back again, to do or say anything more intelligent as an answer to what he'd just asked, foolish or not. She looked like she didn't expect him to say anything specific at all, and that it was all right with her.
Sam didn't care all right; She had known Jack for years, and knew that he was a man of few words. She had accepted that particular personality quirk of his years before...
You know, he felt he had to warn.
You won't be
hearing the right words from me, or what you might want to hear,
I know, she insistently whispered to him.
are you gonna shut up and kiss me, or what?
Slowly Jack smiled. Her decisiveness was one of the many
things he loved about her. Even if it scared him to death right
You bet I am, he declared. He wasn't quite able to
completely hide his longing from her, now, not at this close of a
I just needed a minute to... to get used to the
And now you're used to it? she softly inquired,
moving close enough to him to touch the side of his hand with
hers. She insistently, carefully, wove her fingers through
Jack felt the skin of her hand, and shivered at the touch.
Yeah, he breathily assured. What had he been talking
about..? He was too loopy from just the feel of her skin to...
Which was ridiculous... Then he remembered: Oh yeah, he had
been talking about the way he was getting used to her idea...
That they should... Once again, his gaze moved from her eyes to
her lips. They should... He swallowed, frightened practically
out of his wits, but emboldened just to be thinking about
starting up a real, true relationship with her. More than
anything, in that one moment in time, he wanted to feel if her
lips were as soft as they looked. He wanted to kiss her... Now
that she had mentioned it, the urge was almost unbearable... He
hesitantly started to move closer to her...
I think that.., she said, just as his lips met hers
in the scariest moment in her entire life. It was even more
mind-numbing than the instant she'd realized her mother wasn't
coming home anymore, but it was also a lot softer, more
Damn, this felt good! Jack relaxed into the feel of her arms, melted into his sides, realizing for the first time that he was finally settling all those nagging fantasies he'd always indulged in about how she would feel if he held her. Now, he knew, and boy, was it a fine feeling!
The kiss wore on, growing in longing and passion as it continued, stealing into the realm of totally, heartstoppingly amazing when she ran the tip of her tongue tentatively over his lips touching hers. Holy... Jack sighed. Oh boy! he thought to himself, and responded with a primal growl as he opened his mouth to her. Sam followed her instincts to explore more of him, and she felt him shake as she moved her tongue across his lips.
She drew back, and all his longing, all his repressed
passion, all the love that he'd felt for eight full years crashed
into her in one adoring gaze. She whispered,
Are you all
Jack helplessly laughed a laugh.
How can I not be all
right? he softly asked in a strangled whisper.
You're... He couldn't put words to what he was feeling just
then. His heart was shaking too much. So he just caressed her
face, thanked whatever higher being who was granting his dreams
that night, and gave her a blinding smile.
Oh, I couldn't be
better, he truthfully replied at last.
Sam responded by gifting him with a full smile of her own.
Her gesture turned his knees into something that felt like water. It was a good thing he was already sitting down.
I couldn't be better, either, she finally whispered,
and moved her own hand in a gentle exploration of the hard planes
of his face.
More than just his knees were responding to her at this point; his groin stirred to life, shouting to him so loudly that he couldn't ignore the sensations bombarding him in an insistent manner.
Sam couldn't mistake them, either. She couldn't resist
I won't make any side arm jokes, I promise. She
quietly rubbed her cheek against his own in the most gentle
caress he'd ever experienced.
Just kiss me again, and
Jack leaned into her, instinctively seeking her magnetic warmth, cutting off her promise in mid sentence. Barely aware of what he was doing, he met her lips again in a dance that was as old as the stars they had been looking at earlier in the sky. He couldn't help himself... Like he'd said earlier, he didn't want to stop, didn't want to...
Jack found himself pushing into her, seeking her warmth, feeling his skin almost sear him where she touched it.
And she was touching it... everywhere. Holy Hannah,
Is this the way it's supposed to feel..?
How does it feel? Jack asked her, his breath washing
into her ear. He paused only long enough to make his reply
before he was kissing her again.
It feels.., Sam began when he kissed her beneath her
ear, in one of the few places that made her squirm, and pant, and
clutch at him, and want him to rip her clothes off, even if they
were off world, and really shouldn't... How had he possibly
known so quickly about where that place was on her ear? She
asked him, her words pained, half panting for breath as she
I guessed, he grunted as she craned her head back.
Before, the movement had appeared innocent when she'd looked at
the stars. Now, that move was far from innocent... It was more
like an invitation that was driving Jack to distraction.
God... Carter.., Jack grunted in an agonized whisper to
her. He was delirious with her smell, her taste... He couldn't
quite wrap his brain around the fact that he was kissing Sam
Then, he scraped his hand over the bare skin of her throat.
It was as if he'd branded her.
Sam jumped, but moved in closer to him, as if she wanted him to touch her, wanted to feel his fingers on her skin...
Jack let the tips of his fingers slide over her throat again.
Sam moaned. She actually moaned... and he had made her do
it. He grinned a slow grin that worked its way up from the edges
of his lips, and soon he was taking tiny nips at the skin along
her throat with his mouth, as if he wanted to devour her. He
felt like he did, as if a heat to consume her skin had started in
the middle of his belly, and was moving out into all his limbs.
Carter, I.., Jack started to say, but had to swallow the
rest of his words as she kissed him once more.
Her lips were somehow softer this time than the last. And definitely hotter. And her kiss was harder. And...
God, he just wanted her. He wanted all of her. And he wanted her all of the time.
He'd known he couldn't touch her just once...
At least, he hoped it wasn't just once...
But he was going to give this particular time everything he had in him, and he had been storing up a lot of unspent emotion over the last eight years.
Apparently, so had she. Her fingers were leaving hot trails of fire on his skin. Her hands were shoved tantalizingly into his hair... Her legs were wrapped around his legs, and pulling him even tighter against her. Her hips were pushing into his in stark, unmistakable invitation... an invitation that he couldn't ignore. Even though he knew that he should. Even if he respected her so much that he briefly considered that he should stop right now.
But he also knew that he couldn't stop for anything. The emotion inside him was looping tighter, and hotter, and stronger... His arms shook from the strain of holding his weight off her, of trying to restrain his natural desire for her, his hunger...
Jack whispered the three words then, as if they were torn
out of his throat on a groan and a growl,
God, I love you,
Carter, I love you so much that I'm willing to give away
everything I own for you... Love me, just for one night,
I do, she whispered back, and arched her chest into
Oh, God, how I do.
Then, somehow, her pants were down, and his were down, and her skin was pushing against his, and it was so hot that she burned for him. He pushed into her, so gently that it made her want to scream in frustration.
And then he was touching her, like no one had ever touched
her before. So hot, so slick, so good...
moaned through her teeth tightly clenched against the feeling
that was exploding through her, ripping in hot waves of
pleasure... So searing... So...
Her mind felt like it exploded right then, the tightness
inside her lighting up in shards of flashes on the edges of her
vision, blurring it until she only knew it was caused by him
because of the smell of his skin that was driving her utterly
Jack.., she whispered again, that whisper
sounding more like a forced entreaty threading itself into the
soft side of his neck as she hung on to him in the wildest,
strongest, strangest, most exhilarating ride of her life.
Sam... God, Sam.., Jack tried to say as he cradled
her, and pushed into her, and filled her when he followed into
fire only seconds after her, the sweet sensation of his own
desire soaking into his mind and his heart and his very
One tear of complete fulfillment leaked out of each of her eyes to stain her cheeks and hair with their passing, but she didn't even notice them other than to note the joy that had caused them, when two, three, four drops of water splashed onto her cheeks, and Jack's face floated above her, reduced as he was to the content tears that slid down from his eyes to land on her skin in a sudden avalanche of suppressed emotion. Jack grinned, but tried to shake off the unmanly show of his feelings. At last, he simply dropped his head, and rubbed his face into her skin, leaving a trail of wetness behind for her to revel in. At last, he just smiled, and panted against her shoulder. Sam heaved for air at the side of his neck. When he was more coherent, Jack buried his face in the skin along her neck. He found that skin to be so soft, so delectable, so Sam...
Sam languidly kissed the skin of his own neck.
Perfect, she murmured as she slowly kissed her way up his
chin, and to his sweet, waiting mouth. She kissed him lovingly,
longingly, like she could no longer live without him.
I live without this for so long? she asked into his mouth.
How I love you.
Sam's hands were beginning to explore under his t-shirt, and he both yearned for and was frightened by the intense longing for her that had started to shiver in every corner of his soul.
Let's do this right this time, he said.
Sam smiled. Jack smiled back.
Okay, she instantly
agreed, and set about removing her combat boots, more than
willing to accommodate his every wish.
Now this was how making love should feel! Sam thought to herself in delight. In the next half hour, Sam did her best to fulfill Jack's every want just as she did hers.
And together, they made the stars sing quietly in the darkness of the night sky.
Oh Brother, Wherefore
Thou... er... Thy?... Thine?... Art Right Here.
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